Helen’s Story

Back in 2014 I was working as a palliative care nurse at the Christie Hospital , my dream job and one I loved. I nursed people at their end of their life as part of my role. We laughed together, we cried together but most of all, my patients died with dignity and that was the one thing that I could make sure they got and I was there to support their families and the saddest of times.

I had suffered with cysts in my right breast for years and regularly had to have them drained.  In June this year I attended the hospital for routine drainage and that was the day that began my cancer journey.

To say my diagnosis was a bit of a shock was an understatement, I was a christie cancer nurse, how could I get cancer?  but being a cancer nurse didn't make me immune in fact it was just the start of my busman's holiday. 

Over the next 5 years and following 3 lots of surgery, radiotherapy and having to contend with multiple breast seromas (fluid) I was looking forward to reaching my 5 year “cancerversary”. That's what everyone kept saying, just get to 5 years and you will have beaten it.  I always remember my breast surgeon saying " I will never give you the all clear, cancer can always return,” so know your body, listen to your body and If you are not happy with what it is telling you, go get it checked.

A few weeks before my 5 year goal, My Partner, Pippa and I were just about to finalise our adoption of our then 3 year old Rebecca, our 2 foster children were settled in their new schools and everything was looking good. Then BANG !

I started with a cough, nothing out of the ordinary, but after a week I thought I would go check it out. My GP Dr Crippen , yes that's his name, told me it was a viral infection and that it would go on its own. Did he listen to my chest ..no !  did he do my bloods no !   2 weeks later and still coughing I returned to be told the same.  In the back of my head I should have requested further investigations, but Ialways worried about wasting time and that he knew better, how wrong was I?

It was the 23rd Dec when I was sitting with my sister that I started coughing, I coughed so much that I made my nose bleed, this worried me so I rang the GP and asked for an appointment that day. After arguing for 10min with the receptionist I got an appointment and headed to see the senior GP who immediately sent me for an x-ray and on the 27th Dec I received a message to return to see the doctor who told me that they had found fluid on my right lung.

Over the next few weeks, after having chest drains inserted  biopsies taken, the diagnosis came back.  It was secondary breast cancer, which was in the pleura of the lining of my right lung.

I understand that my cancer is incurable, but is treatable. I am so lucky that I have a fantastic oncologist at the Christies who started me on daily chemo tablets which I take every day for 3 weeks and have a week off to repair the white cells that are destroyed and for now this is keeping the cancer contained to one area.  I am under no illusion that the cancer will start to spread at some point and that we will then need to look for other treatments, but for now I live in the moment.

I live in the hope that I get to see my kids go to university, to see my 5 year old go to high school to keep raising awareness of Maggie’s who have been there from day one.

I have become an ambassador and fundraiser for Maggie's Oldham. I took part in Maggie’s on the Runway 2016 where I met the most incredible people and friends that became part of my friendship circle and who are there whenever I need them. They are my Maggie's Family united by the exclusive club of cancer that no one wants to join.

 Cancer will never define me, I won't let it, I will fight till I can fight no more, ,but until then

I won’t cry over the past - Its gone

I wont’ stress about the future - It hasn’t arrived 

Live in the present and make it beautiful

I will see you all at Maggie’s on the runway 2021    let’s have a blast

PS  Always listen to your body.   If in doubt, check it out ...every time 

Helen X